Boundaries need to be: SET, COMMUNICATED, and RESPECTED.
I recorded my first video episode of The WERKin' Mommas™️ podcast. What is this episode even about? Why should you push play?
At first, I called this "Relationships, Reasons, and Seasons Pt. II" based on another episode of The WERKin' Mommas™️ podcast. It started off that way but grew into something like The Soft Life: Respect My Boundaries, so that's what we're calling it. I keep my episodes short but I know that we're watching and scrolling all kinds of stuff, but this is worth a listen.
If you wanna skip around, I recommend listening to these parts:
Why everybody needs to watch the #CareshaPlease episode with Trina.
This starts at minute 6.
When 👏🏽I 👏🏽 tell 👏🏽 you 👏🏽 - watching that #CareshaPlease episode with Trina felt like laughing with your girlfriends and big homies in VIP. It felt like let's pop the bottles and have some REAL conversations that a lot of people shy away from. It felt like you are enough, and you deserve everything your heart desires and don't let nobody tell you otherwise.
If you haven't seen it, go watch it after you watch the video.
When somebody OVERSTEPS your boundaries.
What do you do when the very person (or people) that mean the most to you violates your boundaries? Unknowingly is on you - if you've set boundaries but didn't tell anybody, you can't get mad when somebody oversteps!
This starts at minute 10.
Now...if you've been crystal clear about your boundaries and somebody feels like you're acting "brand new" or they aren't emotionally mature enough to respect said boundaries, that's a different story. There's a way that these people have to be "handled" so you don't find yourself defending and bending your boundaries to accommodate people.
"When we fail to set boundaries and hold people accountable, we feel used and mistreated. This is why we sometimes attack who they are, which is far more hurtful than addressing a behavior or a choice." – Brené Brown
Why I started knocking on my kids' doors.
I don't wanna spoil this part, you just gotta listen to it. As parents, there's things we must LEARN and UNLEARN from our own upbringing. All the things black parents say!
Don't get it twisted though...
It starts at 12:23 in the video.
I'm not your friend, I'm your Momma.
"I know Momma you're not one of my little friends."
It tickles me when my son says this, but the point is he knows the difference. Play the PlayStation. Play Monopoly. Play with your friends. But don't play with me.
Slide to 15:54 for this very controversial topic.
I've heard parents on both sides of this debate. Are you "friends" with your kids?
The REAL flex is flexin' on myself.
What's the point of flexin' (or trying to) on other people? However you define flexin' in your world depends on where you've been and where you're at. So, you can call yourself flexin' on somebody and they don't see it that way. Your intent to look like a baller or boss has you out here looking like a clown!
22:35 - another part that you just have to listen to.
Don’t Relationships, Reasons and Seasons Pt. I
Tell me about the thoughts that ran through your head as you watched the video.